Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Gonzalez's Heart

We were so excited. Yesterday late afternoon, the Cardiologist asked me how I would feel going home. I said when Jaden is ready and when they say it is time, then I am ready. They said at 5pm that he would get to go home tomorrow (Tuesday). I was in complete shock. So I made many calls and started planning how to get everything ready, packed, the kids situated and Sal's work stuff figured out. Kelly and I stayed up until a little past midnight packing everything and we had to go buy the car seat and stroller since I wasn't going to do it until this weekend.

So we get to the hospital in the morning and everything is still a go. Around 4pm rolls around and they tell us there was a little communication problem and they did not know that the pacer wires had to be out and Jaden stay over night afterwards. We asked why and they said that they had sent a baby home in the past and it died over night. The pacer wire is attached to the heart and they gently pull it out. Well, it could bleed when this is done and they usually monitor the babies for 4 hours. This baby had very slow bleeding so it was not detected with in that 4 hour period and ended up dying.

We were pretty upset and frustrated because this should have been known and they should have taken the wires out the night before. We finally cooled down and knew it was for the better if there could have been a problem. So we did not get to leave today as planned but will leave tomorrow (Wednesday). Sal will have to leave at 6AM to go to work, but I will not be far behind with our little love bug.

After all of the emotions of thinking we could leave and then hearing we could not leave, we were pretty burned out. So Sal and I decided to go out for dinner to the Spaghetti Factory to get away for a little bit. It was nice and we really needed this "last supper" as you could call it before our new life of 5 started.

I would like to ask you all for some prayers for some other families. The first is for Shelly and Jon. They are the couple who came in the same time we did and there baby had the exact same problem as Jaden. Little Mara passed away on Friday from liver failure. They are wonderful people and I am sure are going through some very tough times. This was their first baby and they had been having complications through out all of these past 5 weeks.

There is also a baby named Tin who has a heart problem as well and is not doing well at all. The parents are incredible and very strong. They need prayer for continued strength and to be lifted up in God's glory. They look very tired and almost defeated. They became close with Shelly and Jon and had to see their little one pass on and now their little Tin is not doing well. I can only imagine what is going through their minds right now. So while praying for Jaden, please keep these families in your prayers as well. Also, all of the other families with sick children here in the hospital.

Thank you for your continuous love, prayers and support. We are excited to go home tomorrow and we will be have a "celebration of life" party for Jaden in a few weeks. So keep your eyes posted as all will be invited. I will also keep the blog going on his progress and pictures of our homecoming will be posted as well. We will come back around October for his 2nd surgery and have seen that it is just as hard as the 1st. We will need your prayers through all of what is to come.

Love you all so much, Steph

19 comments:

Kristin said...

Oh, Steph, I can't imagine the disappointment (and probably a bit of anger!) you felt when you found out you had to wait another day!

I'll be praying that there are no more surprises!

PLEASE, call me if you need ANYTHING. I was thinking today that Ashley and Ethan may have fun playing with Chase and Victory... Of course I'm sure they will just want to be with you right now, but let me know if you need a break :)

Love ya!
~kjl

Anonymous said...

My heart went out for little Mara and her parents. Oh how sad. It is too close for comfort. We can be in so much gratitude for the blessing little Jaden received. Prayers going out for all your hospital family friends that have been going through similar experiences.

I have been having a hard time over the last two days to keep the secret of Mommy and Jaden coming home. I was so looking forward to you coming home with Baby Jaden.

The kids were their usual selves... Ethan .. the "wild child" and Ashley, the little "princess" and little actress.. feigning crying when she needs a little attention... I just call her on it until we giggle.

Monday night she woke with wolf nightmares, and I had to make up some fun stories in the middle of the night, then Ashley had to make up a story too, and I thought good we can go to sleep, but no, she said she would dream of that wolf again. So some more songs, some more prayers.... and then it started getting light and she giggled thinking we stayed up all night. So then she slept for the last 1 1/2 hours.

So now tonight, Ethan went to sleep really good after a couple of songs, even though Daddy was gone. (Daddy's with mommy tonight)

So tomorrow morning, we are holding our breath... I have kept your secret from the kids of your coming home but they are still expecting you for Awana... Wait till they see Baby Jaden here too.

By the way, tonight when we were praying, AShley said, why haven't we been praying for Amber? They loved their dog so much, it is going to be hard on them when they find out she had a heart attack and died. Ethan has talked about her a couple of times... I try to change the topic.

Well you guys, I will be praying tonight that there are no unexpected complications so you can come home.

So good night and let's hope I will be able to say good morning very soon.

Love you much,
Mom

Steph T said...

Tomorrow will be such a special day for you! I cannot imagine what it would be like to be gone from home for 5.5 weeks and just have that feeling of when you first walk in the door again. I'm sure that there will be lots of emotions!

I will pray for your friends Shelly and Jon and for baby Tin. I pray that God would show them grace and that they would know He is comforting them. I hope they feel "Held."

I STILL can't wait to hear your voice....giggle. =)

Love ya,
Steph

Kurt and Mattie Krueger said...

Oh, Steph , I am so sorry to hear about Shelly and Jon's baby. They were such a close family in the waiting room , all joining in to share their love and support for one another.
My heart just stopped a beat when I read your words , Little Mara passed away....

May God bless and keep them in their time of need.

I am so sorry you and Sal had to be so frustrated. You both have been so good at taking each step one at a time.

These are the times when I am reminded why we see only one set of foot prints in the sand...

The " celebration of life" is a wonderful thing!

I can't wait to be able to hold "Little Jaden". Our Super Star !

Please give my best to Ashley and Ethan . ooooxxxxx

May God bless and comfort you all.

Love,

Mattie

Steph T said...

Yooo Hooo?? I'm sittin here twiddlin my thumbs and hittin "refresh" looking for an update. Anyone heard from Steph yet??? =)

Krista said...

Hi Guys,
That is so heartbreaking about that little baby. There must have been a reason that you stayed the night and it is almost 4 and there is no update from you so I am hoping that is good news. It won't matter when you get home, everybody is going to be so excited!!! Remember in all of the excitement to take time for you and rest. It has been a long haul. It will be so great to sleep in our own bed!!!

Love,
Krista

PS. Check my blog, I got some pictures of our house on there.

Steph T said...

Ok, so Liz just picked up the kids and said that you came to school to pick up Ashley (without Jaden of course)...so I know that you guys are home! Yay!!! I'm so excited for you and can't wait to read the details of the day.

Love ya,
Steph

Steph T said...

Um...you came to school without Jaden, but yes Jaden is at home...sorry that sounds so confusing!

Anonymous said...

WELCOME HOME!!!!

How did your OWN bed feel?

How did the littlest one do being at home?

How did you suprise Ashley and Ethan when you came home?

I am sure they were smiling huge smiles the whole day!!

Kristin said...

I GOT TO HOLD JADEN!

Okay, sorry, I had to brag a little (mostly for the benefit of Steph T. -- LOL)

He is just so darling! And everyone is THRILLED that he (and of course Steph!) are home :)

And Steph (G.), when I said tonight that ALL babies are miracles but some are just more miraculous than others, Jaden definitely falls into the latter category :)

I'm so excited for you all I'm about crawling out of my skin right now thinking how wonderful it must be for YOU (especially if it feels this good for the rest of us!! LOL)

Okay, got a bit long-winded. Seems to be a trait tonight ;)

Sleep well in your own bed!

~kjl

Anonymous said...

Well, it happened!! Jaden finally got to his own home. Robyn and I did some decorating to welcome him home and mommy home.

Ethan woke up this morning, happy and excited to see mommy, he got dressed quickly, even helped Ashley with her morning chores, after taking AShley to school, the two of us went and got more baloons, found a couple more presents, ... he was being very patient for mommy. I took him to day school and knew mommy would be home in a min. ... yup, I got back home and there they were. I got teary eyed... she was still in the garage and there was Jaden in his new car seat. At last!!! How divine. He said Hi Grandma I am home and now I am ready to eat.. so feed me.

Well I had lunch ready for Steph but life is different... she can't eat when she is hungry when she has a little one like Jaden. No, food had to wait.

First, he had to eat. I fed him... much more difficult than one knows. It is not like a normal feeding. I had to be taught how to mix the milk, I will still need more training. Then the feeding itself has to be different so he doesn't get too much. Then burping, changing diapers, mommy had to pump, then she had to figure out all the medications, she filled the daily doses and we talked about how to set up a meds stations, ... he got his meds...
NOW WE CAN EAT. We were both hungry.

HOw was the rest of the day?... Well Steph got to pick up Ashley while I watched Jaden. When Ashley saw Ethan she was so happy and had to hold him. She was so thrilled.
Then it was time to pick up Ethan. So Steph surprised him and then when Ethan saw Jaden, at first he didn't know what to think then after his "second take" he did his jumping up and down and getting excited number.
He had to hold him...the rest of the afternoon, it was like they were after mommy all the time to help feed Jaden, to hold him, to give him his meds, Ethan couldn't understand why he couldn't give him the meds. Oh my, oh my. It was tiring just watching his determination and his not understanding that he couldn't just take care of him. Mommy was so good helping them with Jaden.

Well have they started to unpack yet? NO

While all this was happening, I was trying to fix dinner, because we had to hurry to get to Awana. You can imagine the challenge that Steph has to tend to Jaden's needs as well as two other mommy deprived children.

Now Sal has come home early and is unloading bags, etc.

When we got to Awana, Ethan had to point out to everyone that Jaden was HIS baby. He was so proud of him.

It was so nice to see how wonderful all the parents were at Awana, greeting Steph and Sal, hugging,and of course welcoming baby however they did.

So not later we are home, are they unpacked yet? No.

Tomorrow, there is so much to do and I hate to say, i must go home by late afternoon... I am exhausted.

Just having Ashley and Ethan, the day starts no later than 6:30... and then non stop.. unto 8:30 at night. Wheewww. Part of the schedules always involves doing various mental and artistic taskes. They love to sit down and do it too. They have those kids trained well. No TV for them...just creative activites. .

I give you all a glimps of this... because this is a mother. Many of you reading this know what all that means. Even after the kids go to bed, is their work even done then? No.

With a special baby, this is going to be very hard for Steph and Sal. It would be nice if money grew on trees, then Sal could stay at home, but he has to go win bread so he has to be gone.

For those who know me, at night time I can have a tenedency to ramble on .. I just found myself falling asleep while writing this... so I better be off to bed. Tomorrow night, I will be home to recouperate from some wild days. hehe

Being with the kids is a blessing, what a gift. Forget if Ethan is five hands full, I love them so much and it is a priviledge to be with them.

Well,everyone in the house is sleeping ... so I am on my way,

Be patient with hearing from Steph... she sill has to unpack the computer.

nighty nite,
Rose

Steph T said...

Mama Rose, your post made me laugh and cry. Thanks so much for writing to let us know how the day went! I will be patient... =)

Steph T

Krista said...

What a great homecoming!!! I'm sure there is nothing like getting home and seeing everybody again. It will be great to get back in to your old routine and seeing all of your friends and everybody getting to see your "SUPER STAR." Enjoy getting settled in and just being at home!! I am so sorry that we couldn't make it up there to see you before you went home.

Love,
Krista

Anonymous said...

Okay, now what?????? I'm sure I'm not the only one who wants to know: Did you get to go home? How's the first few days back been? Were Ash and Ethan really excited? We demand answers!! Someone fill us in!! Thank! Megan

Anonymous said...

UPDATE:

Stephanie has her hands so full, as I mentioned in my previous comment, it may be 1 day or 5 days before she can dig her computer out and take time for that. So I will share some update.

Yesterday we took Baby Jaden to his first "Well Child" check up. When I walked in, and saw those words it put a real smile in my heart. Well child..he now can be considered a "well Child". Yeaaaa!!!!

His check up was fine. I got to meet Jaden's Doctor, a marvelous Lady Doctor who is all what Stephanie said she was. She takes 150% interest in the children and families she sees.

Jaden has been drinking well. He has no problem with an appetite. That is good as one of the goals is to fatten him up. Steph says that he will, according to the doctors, always be slim.

Jaden seems to want to eat every couple of hours... Steph has to fix medication for 5 different times a day. This takes up the whole counter and lot of dedicated work. One she has to crush. Others she has to measure and then put in these dispensers. Sal does the best job in getting Jaden to swallow those medications.

We had a long list of things to do yesterday, but in taking care of Jaden, the list slips away and only a couple things gets done. Unpacking is there on the list... There are suitcases filled in the entrance and three times as many that are in the garage.

Sal has been tring to be at home much more but that means less income coming in and with more expenses, that could be a challenge. Challenges make us stronger. They are both creative and strong and as time passes, I am sure that they will figure out how to handle all these challenges that are divinely given them. Isn't that the secret? Knowing that God's hand is on everything? That he will give nothing that we can't handle. The secret to my days is to never not be in awe and gratitude for every single morning, to take in those early moments to see the wonderful gifts that are freely given, the new green buddying leaves, or the drops of rain, or the magical sunrise, the colors of the sky giving depth and hue to the clouds. How can anyone who does that ever start the day glum... Then add all the other gifts to be in gratitude and you can't help but to start the day energetic and with a song in the heart.

Oh, here I go rambling again. Anyway, I could not stay longer with the family this week. If only she and baby would have come at the beginning of the week. With me having some maybe heart complications the week before and also fighting some congestion in my lungs, 4 days were the maximum I could handle physically. I always will overdo and I don't mind and usually can easily handle it. This time, because my system was already compromised, I knew I had to go. So she is without anyone during the day today except if Sal can come home early. Thanks to Steph T. who has been taking our "hands full" young sweet Ethan, it helps handle the load.

So I ask that anyone out there reading this, please now send out prayers for Steph and Sal to handle all the extra responsibilities and stress.

So I am back home wishing I could have handled more, also feeling guilty, but I do know when I have to pause so I can work another time. :))

so by for now
and extra blessings go out to Jaden and his mommy, daddy, sister and brother.

Love coming from his grandma Rose

Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for the updates Mama Rose.
Steph, we know you are trying to handle the extra lovin up of Ashely and Ethan as well as being at Jaden's beck and call with his special needs. I am sure I can speak for everyone when I say that we are still thinking and praying for the Gonzalez family. We are anxious to reconnect with you and know you will "speak" with us again when you are somewhat under control back at home-sweet-home!

Kurt and Mattie Krueger said...

" HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY "


Steph ,

I know this will be a truly happy day for you and all the Gonzalez's family, as well as all of us Krueger's.

We all have so many things to be thankful for...

God has blessed us all with so many, many, blessings.

I can't wait to give all the children big hugs .

How was Awana ? Did the children get awards too?

How wonderful to be able to share your joy with your church family so soon after Jaden coming home.

Take care, and have a great day.

Love,

Mattie in Arizona

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